Most of us are aware of what God teaches us in the Bible regarding sex before marriage. God makes it very clear that the sex is to only take place within the confines of marriage and He has many good reasons for such a command. However, that is not my focus today.
As I was laying bed pondering marriage and intimacy the almost 16 years I have been married, I asked myself what I recall as some of the truest intimate moments with my husband.
The very first thoughts that God brought to my mind had nothing to do with our bedroom but EVERYTHING to do with deep rooted, I place my life and heart in your hands..... trust.
The intimate moments God revealed to me were precious moments in which I was not just physically bare but heart stripped, dead modesty bare. Where it was not just my skin and breasts that were visible to my spouse, but my frailty and vulnerability as a woman.
One of the first memories that popped into my mind was the mess a woman becomes after giving birth. This is a true moment of vulnerability and baring all things that normally you may keep hidden behind close doors. You are saggy, sweaty, shaky, and dripping bodily fluids like a rushing waterfall.
You are exhausted and very often experience swelling and throbbing pain in very personal areas of your body. Trying to adjust yourself in the bed can be excruciating.
I will never forget the intimacy I experienced with my husband after third child was born. Everyone had left and it as just myself, Garrick and the baby in the room. She was sleeping peacefully, so I was ready to take on the shower. I was extremely sore and walking was a bit of a challenge.
Garrick helped me out of bed, walked me into the bathroom, started the shower for me, got all of the items I would need to shower prepared and easily accessible for me, helped me remove my hospital gown, took my hand and helped me into the shower as those bodily fluids poured from my body and my saggy stomach was falling to my knees. He helped wash my back, he grabbed towels and cleaned up the fluids from the floor. He helped me dry off, helped me put on my mother of all granny panties, complete with the ice pack and mattress pad and then guided me back to bed.
THAT. Was intimacy like I have never experienced before. I can recall feeling so incredibly close to my husband at that moment. Here I was in one of the most vulnerable and honestly, grossest, moments of my life and he was there, completely giving himself to me. Not sickened and grossed out by my condition but lovingly supportive of it.
He saw every part of me that day. Not just skin, breasts and body parts, but he saw all of those things in their most fragile moment and he loved me and cared for me like he never had before.
As that moment and still to this day, I understood what true intimacy is in marriage. It's not just the baring of skin and bodily contact, it's the wiping of bodily fluids and gazing at saggy and swollen skin and feeling nothing but love and seeing nothing but beauty that God intended.
The world has it wrong. Intimacy begins in the heart and soul of two humans. Once that intimacy has been experienced, anything that happens in the bedroom, is just icing on the cake.
Peace and Blessings