Meaningful, Messy Marriage
❤Moments ❤

(Learning to Let God Lead….. One Day at a Time)
-A Woman Redeemed
GOOD SUNDAY!  Today... we are moving on to step 4 in the journey to forgiveness!!!  Last week we established the fact that it is nearly impossible to move to forgiveness without a humble heart.  Jesus demonstrates this beautifully for us with His life on earth.  As long as we inhabit a heart a prideful heart, seeing our spouses sin as greater than ours, we will struggle greatly with forgiveness.  

Once again, I will reiterate, that if our spouse has not been repentant, most of these steps are going to be a monstrous challenge, however, with the strength of Christ, we can still slowly push forward.  This week we are going to zone in on one of my favorite scriptures that I really need tattooed somewhere on my body that I can see it ALL THE TIME!  Philippians 4:8!!!

One of my greatest struggles is being what Garrick refers to is an "archaeologist," digging up the past!!! LOL Now, in my defense, sometimes it is not so much digging up that past, as it is struggling to remove the memories from my heart and mind.  It does not take much to trigger bad memories and consequently, the negative emotions that come along with those memories.  I battle this often.  There is a difference, however, in choosing to dwell on negative past issues and simply struggling with pop up memories that draw deep emotion.  

What we have to learn to do is reign those thoughts and memories in and replace them with God's truths and promises.  The moment those thoughts enter your mind, you have to choose to take them captive and replace them with positive thoughts and meditations.  No matter what our spouse has done in the past, they inhabit some wonderful qualities, or it is very unlikely we would have married them in the first place.  We have to fight to regain the positive memories and put to death the negative ones.  

*NOTE* to both spouses here..... this is VERY VERY VERY hard to do, when NEW bad memories continue to be created!  You must make a genuine effort to kill the past negative habits and actions that built up that giant wall of negative memories.  Hopefully, this devotion will continue to help you do so.  

BUT, for this week.... we are going to focus on these two scriptures..... 

"Finally brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report. if there is virtue or anything praiseworthy,- meditate on these things." Philippians 4:8

"We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God and take every thought captive to obey Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:6

1. What does Philippians 4:8 tell us to focus on?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:









2. What are some positive and lovely things you can focus on about your spouse and your marriage?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








3.  What are some thoughts you need to put to death?


❤Husband’s Response:









❤Wife’s Response:








4. What does 2 Corinthians 10:6 tell us to do with our thoughts?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








5.  What does it mean to "take our thoughts captive"?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








Take a few minutes and write down all the positive and lovely qualities your spouse has and then share them with each other.  Keep these treasured lists for future reference and to remind yourself, your spouse does see goodness in you!!!

Peace and Blessings
Your Friends
Missy and Garrick
 
 
Pride is a sneaky thing. When we think of a prideful person, more than likely, we think of arrogance and stubbornness.  Someone who thinks very highly of themselves and makes sure everyone else knows it.  Someone who always has to be right and struggles with seeing anyone else's point of view.  

The funny thing is, pride can be extremely sneaky.  Sneaky?  Let me expand.  We may believe that we are the total opposite of prideful but in buried in the root of our heart, pride is alive and well.  

This can definitely rear it's ugly head in marriage, when our spouse messes up.  It is very easy to allow that pride to sneak it's ugly way in, by dwelling on what our spouse did wrong, insisting that we would NEVER do something like that.  It is at it's root.... pride.

Now it may be very true..... that you have not,nor could you imagine doing something as hurtful or devastating as your spouse has done, but trust me when I say, we often have no idea the wickedness that hides in our hearts.  

Just as you are way stronger than you think and are capable of much greater things than your probably give yourself credit for, your flesh is also capable of much more darkness than you are even aware of.  

If you would have asked Garrick 6 years ago, when God first started our church, if he had the capability of becoming an active addict that would forsake his marriage and family to feed his addiction, he would have been adamant that was not possible!  He would never allow that to happen!

Guess what..... he allowed that to happen.  

So the bottom line is this.... hurt is hurt and it can take quite awhile to heal.  But do not intermix pride with hurt.  Hurt is very different.  Pride is believing you are above the transgression your spouse committed, hurt is simply the negative side effect or your spouses transgression.  

Never be so prideful to think.... you could not be taken captive by your flesh.  You have to ALWAYS be on guard, guarding your heart from the woos of the devil.  He is hot on your tail and unfortunately, very seldom relents.  

We have to allow God to humble our hearts.  As long as we wrestle with pride, believing we are in a way "better" than our spouse, we will struggle greatly with forgiveness.  

So let us ponder our scriptures for the day!

Is it possible to be an honorable person, without a humble heart?  

According to Proverbs 15:33, no, it is not.  Pride is a very ugly thing!!!  Jesus was a perfect and flawless example of what a humble heart should look like AND what a humble heart can accomplish!!!  

His focus was on God's purpose for His life, rather than the needs of His flesh.  He understood that though MOST of the things that happened to Him were not fair, they were part of a greater plan that would serve to benefit the world, not just Him.  

The Hands of God.... Can Mold A Humble Heart.

There is no limit to what God can do.... with a wiling heart.  A prideful heart, on the other hand, will produce nothing but strife.  

I will not lie, this is a struggle for me at times.  I find myself fighting against God's will, believing my way makes more sense.  I have learned through the past years of struggle..... 

It does not have to make sense..... to have purpose.  

Next, through Matthew 6:15, we learn the hard truth.... 'if you do not forgive others, your Father will not forgive you."  Pretty simple and needs very little explanation. 

The bottom line to this is.... if you are going to expect God to forgive your sins, which are more than likely like mine.... plentiful.... then you have no right to withhold forgiveness from others.  You cannot expect and accept forgiveness from Christ's death and in turn refuse forgiveness to others.  That is pride at it's ugliest!! And believe me when I say, it simply does not work like that.  

NOW... I have mentioned in previous posts that forgiveness is not always a decision, it is often a journey.  Sometimes, we may be able to choose immediate forgiveness as our heart is aligned with God's will, other times, due to pain and hurt, it may take some time and work.  

That is ok!!  As long as you continue to push forward through the journey and as long as you understand.... you are COMMANDED to forgive... it is not an option..... it is a command!




Now, you may be asking.... "how on EARTH do I forgive when my spouse is not repentant???"  Perhaps your spouse has not been enlightened yet and has not fully seen the devastation of their sin.  You cannot control that and you cannot make them see it, however, you can still choose to work toward forgiveness.

This will more than likely be a longer process and take much more time, effort and strength from the Lord, but it is very possible.  How do I know this??  

Take Romans 5:8 for instance...

"But God demonstrates His love for us in this, while we were still sinners. Christ died for us."

While the world sat and mocked Christ, spit on Him, called Him names and falsely accused Him of wrongdoings that landed Him hanging on a cross, beaten to a pulp and bleeding from every crevice of His body..... He asked God to forgive them all!!!

THAT..... is love.   THAT... is humbleness.  THAT.....is our calling.  You are not responsible for your spouses actions and you certainly are not expected to like them, condone them or affirm them.  You are only responsible for your own actions.... and God calls you to forgive... even when forgiveness may not seem due.

Now don't confuse forgiveness for reconciliation.  Forgiveness does not mean you have to allow their negative behavior back in your life.  You have the right to set healthy boundaries for yourself and follow through with them. God can and will still give you the power to forgive.... while still allowing you to care for yourself.  

What would that type of forgiveness look like';
in our situation, if Garrick had continued to choose his addiction, I could choose to forgive him, but still separate from him, until he became healthy and killed the addiction. I could still offer him prayers and encouragement, but I do not have to enable to forgive.  

You have to be aware of forgiveness being used as a manipulation tactic to get you to comply with the transgressors wishes.  Don't fall for it.  You can offer love and forgiveness without offering up your mental health and well being.  There is a HUGE difference!!!  

I was fully prepared to do this in my own marriage.  I could not flourish and stay mentally and/or physically stable while living with an active addict.  

Now, in our situation, this was a big issue that effected the entire family.  Most of the transgressions we experience in our marriage are not quite as devastating and monumental.  We have to get good at forgiving the little things..... before we will be prepared to forgive the major things.  

Everyday.... God will give you chances to choose forgiveness in your marriage.  I truly believe that.  He will also give you the tools and strength to do it.... but not without first recognizing your own flaws and transgressions and being aware that you are NOT better than your spouse.... even though outward actions may look that way.  

We have to ask God to humble our hearts, in order for us to be willing and open to carry out His greater purposes in our lives.  

Hands down, my greatest struggle with forgiveness in our marriage has been through Garrick's addiction.  This is due to the hurt and pain is caused my heart and it takes a woman's heart a great length of time to heal and trust again.  

I have to fight the urge to regress sometimes when something happens that sparks a bad memory or thought.  It is often a daily struggle.... but one I am winning with God;s strength on my side! 

Have you identified your greatest struggle with forgiveness in your marriage??

Ask God to humble your heart today.... and help you to offer that forgiveness to your spouse. Be patient through the journey and wait in expectation for miracle to happen!!!

Peace and Blessings
Your Friends
Missy and Garrick 
 
 
Meaningful, Messy Marriage
❤Moments ❤

(Learning to Let God Lead….. One Day at a Time)
-A Woman Redeemed
Howdy!!  This week we are going to continue journeying through the topic of forgiveness in marriage!!  We have discussed the first two steps; recognizing your new identity in Christ and placing your trust in Christ's hands, not your spouses.  

This week we are going to work on step 3, which I find, to be one of the most difficult!!!  This week we zone in on HUMBLENESS.  Jesus was the perfect and flawless model of humbleness.  He is the King of the world.  Creator of the universe, yet, He came to earth to be a servant.  He slept on the ground, had no place to call home, washed the disciples feet and took a excruciating punishment for the entire world, even those that hate Him!
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When our spouse transgresses against us, especially if it is a pretty significant thing, it becomes very easy for out heart to breed pride.  We look at what our spouse has done and may think.... "I would NEVER do something like that! I have messed up, but not THAT BAD!"

I have definitely personally struggled with this issue!  As long as my heart is stuck in pride mode, it will be very difficult, it not IMPOSSIBLE, to forgive my spouse.  Step 3 in forgiving is allowing God to humble your heart and kill that pride.  And while it may be true that you have not messed up "that" badly or you would never do what they have done; I am sure, if you asked Christ, He would have a list of sins you have committed that would leave you blushing!!

My point is this; our sins may be different and our sins may not seem as damaging, and perhaps they aren't, but they are sins none the less and where would we be, without God's forgiveness on a daily basis?

So this week, we are going to work on asking God to humble our hearts and recognize without His gift of forgiveness, we would be hopeless!  The hardest thing will be finding this humbleness even if our spouse is not repentant!  We will work more on this next week! Read these scriptures with your spouse and complete the following questions.  

"The fear of the Lord is instruction in wisdom, and humility comes before honor? Proverbs 15:33

"But if you do not forgive others sins, your Father will not forgive yours." Matthew 6:15

"But God demonstrates His love for us in this, while we were still sinners. Christ died for us." Romans 5:8


1.  According to these scriptures, can you be an honorable person, if you do not have a humble heart?


.  
❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








2. Are we still able to be forgiven, even if we choose not to forgive?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








3. How does Christ demonstrate the ultimate humble heart to us?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








4.  Where is the greatest are you struggle with forgiveness?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








5. Do you have an unrepentant sin against your spouse?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








Take some time to really discuss this topic and ask God to humble your heart before your spouse.  This one can be very tough, especially if you have been hurt greatly!  Give each other grace and do not use this as a weapon or a guilt producer, use this to grow in a beautiful way!!  

Peace and Blessings
Your Friends
Missy and Garrick 


 
 
There is no doubt about it!  I think most of us would agree there is no one that can frustrate or hurt us more than our spouse.  Consequently, there is also no one on earth that we long to be loved and appreciated more from, than our spouse.  

Have you ever questioned why that is?

Well, God revealed that to me this morning and it was kind of a DUH moment.  No ones has more effect on you, than your spouse, because you are ONE with them.  You became one flesh, remember?  Therefore, it only make sense that their actions and words would effect us more than anyone elses. 

BUT REMEMBER THIS..... both you and your spouse are also ONE with God.  Everything you do, you bring God along with you for the ride.  

So who is more important??  

God of course.  

This is where a lot of us go very wrong in our marriage.  We begin placing our spouse above God.  We put our trust in them, rather than God.  We place our faith in them to meet our needs and desires, rather than God.  We idolize their love and affection more than Gods.  

And the hard truth is, our spouse does not gold a candle to God.  There is no competition.  God has the ability to provide for you and meet your needs better than your spouse could on their best day.  

Here is why this is so important in the process of forgiveness.  

Addiction is a scary thing because you have no idea if and when that desire to use will pop back into the addicts mind.  The struggle with addiction is alive in them, even if it is laying dormant.  Therefore, I have absolutely no assurance that my spouse will not relapse or fall prey to his addiction again.  You cannot trust an addict, as the entire disease revolves around deceit, lies and manipulation.  

So how do I ever move on?  How to I ever forgive when I am constantly worried that any day may be doom's day?

This is how.... by not placing my hope and faith in Garrick's strength.... but Gods!!!!

Everyday, I pray to God for my husband and I place my trust in God to continue to restore him and keep him from falling.  

This has been my greatest struggle hands down.  The moment I begin to place my trust back on my husband, the fear and worry take over.  I begin questioning his every move and paranoia takes over.  
Picture
We are clearly NOT ready for MONDAY!!!! LOL
God centers and grounds me.  He keeps me focused on the BIG picture.... which is His purpose will not be withheld from me and He will make good out of anything situation He throws my way.  When I place my trust back on Him.... the fear and anxiety disappear and joy returns.  

Garrick stated that the greatest way he places me above God in our marriage is his desire for affection.  His love language is physical affection, random hugs, back rubs, snuggling.  And while I enjoy those things, our past experiences have taken this desire away from me as it used to be.  I struggle more with giving or receiving physical affection.  This is a consequence of trust being broken.  

As time goes on and my trust is rebuilt, it becomes easier for me.  However, in the meantime, Garrick struggles with allowing this to effect him rather than trusting God's perfect timing and purpose.  

Just as I have to continue to pray for God to keep my husband from falling he has to pray for God to restore my desire for affection as it used to be.  

Placing our trust in one another will only leave us feeling discouraged and hopeless, which in turns drives us to bitterness.  Bitterness will make forgiving extremely difficult.  

Forgiveness..... is born through a trust in God's sovereign will.  Bitterness dies.... at the birth of trust.  

Where are your struggles with trust?  

Give them to God today and watch your heart.... find forgiveness you never thought possible.  

Peace and Blessings
Your Friends
Missy and Garrick 
 
 
Meaningful, Messy Marriage
❤Moments ❤

(Learning to Let God Lead….. One Day at a Time)
-A Woman Redeemed
Prior to Christmas, God lead me to begin a segment on forgiveness in marriage.  It is no surprise that God placed this topic on my heart considering the road Garrick and I have traveled in the past few years.  Forgiveness is an essential part of a healthy, functioning marriage and is also a commandment as a follower of Christ.  

Anyone who professes to be a Christian is very much aware of God's call to forgive others; even our enemies, even those that are not sorry.  This can be extremely challenging and often times; may feel impossible!  I know, as I have been there.  

One of the things that God has taught me about forgiveness is it is often a process.  You may choose in your mind that you want and will forgive someone, but it may take some time for your heart to catch up with your head.  That is why you cannot be lead by your heart, you must lead your heart.  

The first week we talked about forgiveness; I addressed what Garrick and I believe is step one; which is recognizing that you are a new creation in Christ, therefore, it is very possible to forgive, even when you feel you can't.  

We studied 2 Corinthians 5:17.... Therefore you are a new creation in Christ.  

This week we are going to talk about step 2; which is placing your trust in the proper place... which the hands of God, not your spouse.  Once you understand that you are now a new creation in Christ, it is essential that you learn to place your trust in any situation in hands of Christ rather than the hands of your spouse.  

This is one of the ONLY ways that I can continue to push forward, not allowing the fear and worry of Garrick relapsing with his addiction consume me.  The trust in our marriage was badly damaged by the past events, therefore, if my only hope was placing my trust in Garrick, every day would be a struggle.  

When marriage gets to the point that it seem hopeless, it truly may be without the miraculous, restoring power of God being invited in.  This week, we are going to read one of my favorite scriptures in Jeremiah and then discuss as a couple the areas that we struggle with placing our trust in our spouse, rather than God.  

"Cursed is the man that trusts in man, and makes flesh his strength.whose heart turns away from the Lord.  He is like a shrub in the desert and will not see any good to come.  Blessed is the man that trusts in the Lord, whose trust is in the Lord.  He is like a tree planted by water that sends out its roots by the stream and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green." Jeremiah 17:5-8

1. What does this scripture state trusting in man and your flesh will result in ?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








2. What does this scriptures state will result in trusting in the the Lord?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








3. Discuss the things you struggle with placing your trust in your spouse rather than God, in your marriage.


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








4. Has placing your trust and faith in your spouse rather than God had positive or negative effects?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:








5. Name some ways that as a couple, you can begin to put your faith in trust in God rather than one another?


❤Husband’s Response:








❤Wife’s Response:


 
 
 
 
Last night Garrick and I took some time to reflect on the past year and pray and focus on our goals for this year!  

As we are both fully aware of the painful and difficult year 2016 was, we did not need to rehash very much!  Our focus now, needs to be pushing forward while allowing healing and restoration to continue to grow.  

Goal setting sounds very boring and cliche!  Many people associate goal setting with more work or extra burden, however, I have found it to be the exact opposite.  When I don't set goals, I very rarely achieve much of what I desire to achieve.  It is amazing to me how much more I accomplish in a day when I write out a simple to do list.  There is also a great satisfaction that comes with scratching things off that list!! Trust me on this one!

The trick as I have mentioned before, is make sure the goal is attainable and to break it down into bite size pieces so it is not overwhelming!

For instance, in terms of our marriage, it would be pretty ridiculous for me to set the goal of taking two overseas vacations together.  First off, I know our finances would most likely NOT allow this as well as the time needed, therefore, even if I would love to do it, I would not make this a goal.  Rather, I made it a goal to have at least 2 getaways throughout the year!  This could be a weekend, a week or simply an overnight somewhere.  This goal is both attainable and important to us!

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So after discussing the doy ik  ww1e`kl//.wnfalls and successes of 2016, we concluded that our mutual marriage goal would be this...

*For both Missy and Garrick to walk in obedience to God word and directives with all of the strength God offers and to grow in our relationship with God, knowing this will greatly benefit and strengthen our marriag

So here are the bite size pieces....

  • Read the Bible daily, individually or together.
  • Daily prayer time, specific to our marriage daily, individually or together. 
  • Pray together at least 4 times per week.
  • Continue our Sunday evening devotion
  • Have at least one date night a month away from home
  • Take at least 2 yearly getaways together.


So there you have it!  All of these little pieces are totally doable and if we are diligent about them, they will lead us to a closer relationship with the Lord and each other!

Peace and Blessings
Your Friend
Missy
 
 
Meaningful, Messy Marriage
❤Moments ❤

(Learning to Let God Lead….. One Day at a Time)
-A Woman Redeemed
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!  Last week we took a little hiatus but this week, we are back!!  As all of you probably know, 2016 was not the greatest year for our marriage, in fact, it was pretty brutal most of the time. Today.... we begin a new chapter as it is the first day of a new year, however, I want to take this is step further and encourage all of my readers to begin looking at each DAY as a new beginning.  
Each day may bring with it successes and failures, however, one failure does not define your entire year, each morning, His mercies are new and He offers a new beginning.  Actually, God offers this moment to moment .  It is never too late to start again.  

This week..... embrace this in your marriage.  Take some time to relish in the fact that bad moments..... do not make bad marriages, bad years of bad lives.  

"And he who was seated on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new."  Revelation 21:5

This week we are going to set a goal for our marriage for the year. Spend some time reflecting on 2016 and anticipating 2017!

1.  What struggles do we identify in our marriage for 2016?









2.What were our successes for 2016?









3. What is my strongest desire/ hope for our marriage in 2017?









4. What is a mutual goal we have for our marriage for 2017?









5.  What are the steps or bite size pieces we will set to reach this goal?









Peace and Blessings
Your Friend
Missy



 
 
Meaningful, Messy Marriage
❤Moments ❤

(Learning to Let God Lead….. One Day at a Time)
-A Woman Redeemed
WELCOME TO WEEK 11 of the Meaningful Messy Marriage devotional!!!!  AND... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!  This week, in celebration of Christmas we are going to do something a little off course from our forgiveness devotion.  This week, we are going to focus on GIFTS!  Yes!!  BUT, not the gifts you may be thinking of! 

Though there are going to be many days that you do not see things in this manner, your spouse was a gift to you, from God.  His goal was to create unity between the two of you, creating an easier and more joyful life as you learn to compliment one another with your gifts and talents. 

So.... this week, we would like you to take the time to make a list of the gifts your spouse has and how they have enhanced your life.  Really take your time and be thoughtful about this.  Then, we would like you to write down the one thing that you could work on in your marriage that would be a gift to your spouse.  Perhaps you have a short temper, you are not good at helping around the house, you struggle with showing affection.  Spend some time talking with your spouse about something that would be a gift to them!!

1.  The gifts my husband has-









2. The gifts my wife has-








3. What is something I could work on as a gift to my husband?









4.  What is something I could work on as a gift to my wife?









5.  How can we, as a married couple, be a gift to others?










MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!
Peace and Blessings
Your Friend
Missy
 
 
GOOD MORNING!  God has lead me to start a new little segment of the marriage devotion on forgiveness.  

As I mentioned on yesterday's post, though we are called as believers to forgive, forgiveness can be a process. Sometimes, our hearts are completely ready to forgive and move past the transgression; other times, our hearts may be willing and ready to forgive but have been badly wounded.  Your heart may need time to heal.  Forgiveness does not always mean immediate reconciliation of the relationship.  

Here is the MAJOR thing to remember, if it truly forgiveness, your heart will remain on the journey to heal.  You will long to have your heart feel whole again in order to reconcile the relationship in your marriage.  There are times I have been "stuck" in a stage of forgiveness because I have not felt my husband's repentance or apology was truly authentic.  Though, we are called to forgive even when the transgressor is not repentant, this can make working through the process of forgiveness extremely difficult. 

It is only by the power of Christ within you, that you can find the strength to push forward to forgiving. 

And sometimes, your spouses apology may be authentic, but your heart is longing for true signs of this as a self protection  This is the thing we all have to remember, God was able to forgive our repented sins and cast them into the sea where He will remember them no more.  We as humans cannot do this.  Though we can choose to forgive, we cannot forget, no matter how hard we try. 

There were times along this journey with Garrick that my heart would begin to heal a bit and my negative and bad memories began being replaced with good ones again, but then in the throws of addiction, he would hurt me again and the bad memories would come back like a damaging flood.  I would have to start the process of forgiveness all over again.  

Keep this in mind, especially when you are the one seeking forgiveness from your spouse; a truly repentant heart is not going to use a believers call to forgive as a weapon of manipulation.  A truly repentant person will not make the person they sinned against feel guilty or pushed into forgiving them.  They will humbly ask for forgiveness and wait patiently and lovingly for the person to work through the process of forgiving.  

When you have sinned against your spouse, or anyone for that matter, even if forgiveness is granted, there may still be negative consequences from the sin.  There were times I could extend forgiveness but my heart was badly wounded.  This was a consequence and repercussion of the sin.  Forgiveness does not mean a wiping out of all consequences.  
There may be times when you feel the transgression was way to big and hurtful to extend forgiveness.  I have been there, however, it is Christ IN me that eventually softens my heart and helps me to begin the process of forgiving.  

This leads me, finally, LOL to our scripture for this week, 

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away, the new has come." 2 Corinthians 5:17

If you have accepted Christ into your heart.... you are a NEW creation.  The person you once were died when Christ entered your heart, the old has passed away. This is what it means to be "in" Christ Jesus.  He is now a part of you.  He lives in you, therefore, your heart will begin to think like His heart.  That is the goal of Christianity. Therefore, even though I may be badly hurt and struggling to forgive, in my heart, I will know that is what I am called to do and I will diligently seek to get there with Christ's strength and power.  

This is how people are able to forgive what the world would deem as unforgivable.  It is not in my own strength and heart that I am able to do it.  Left to my old flesh, there is a very good chance, my marriage may have ended.  

This ability to forgive, when you accept Christ into your heart, will be a witness and testimony to the world of God's grace and mercy.  It will demonstrate to the world that God has the power to heal, redeem and restore anything with a willing and obedient heart.  

As we push through the next few weeks, we will continue to work through the process of forgiveness.  If you are struggling with forgiving in your marriage or any relationship for that matter, may your journey to healing, begin today.  

Peace and Blessings
Your Friend
Missy